Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Myths and Legends

Just some gripes I had since I was the chosen one to run the clinic today. Doctors are a pretty secretive clique, I admit - and the fact that our odd hours and schedules make it hard to socialize with others outside our milieu makes us even more alienated from the general public. But it's only when you're down in the clinic dealing with the common folk that you get to hear some really unusual beliefs that patients hold about doctors.

One of the great myths that patients have about doctors is the very odd idea that all of us are on intimate terms with each other. Although the numbers aren't that large, surely we can't know all the doctors in town. I'm here to tell you guys that they don't actually produce doctors from some dodgy, makeshift factory in Puchong ( no matter what the tabloids might say :) ) - and despite what everyone believes, we don't actually attend regular golf luncheons on the weekends getting to know each other. Hell, I don't even own a golf club.

Patients also believe that doctors can recognize all kinda of meds. They come into the clinic with bags of white pills that are impossible to differentiate. Seriously, pharmaceuticals make all sorts of generic drugs that come in a million colours and shapes - and that doesn't even include the fake illegals coming from that dodgy factory. And you wouldn't believe the number of drugs that come in circular white.

Along with recognizing every single drug in the world, patients expect us to know a little about everything - even about things way out of our milieu. About taxes, people? How could I know? If I knew everything, I'd be the omniscient wise old man hiding out on a mountain.

Told the story to Big Bicep Barry and we had a laugh today during dinner. I had a quarter roasted chicken with side orders of macaroni & cheese and mashed potatoes - the dieting boy/man had a bowl of salad. What is it with him and healthy, leafy vegetables? Later, I forced a pity wing on him when I noticed him salivating desperately over the rotisserie. Those curious enough would be glad to know that I actually held his hand for a full minute today at a public restaurant. Not only was I devious and evil in my intentions, I pretended to check for his pulse and held his hand captive.

Barry : Feel anything?
Wicked Paul : I'd actually like to feel more.
Barry : Very funny.

(Pause.)

Barry : I need that hand to eat my chicken, you know.
Wicked Paul : I'd prefer eating you.
Barry : Finish your chicken first.


I know. I can be so unbelievably forward ( and somewhat of a slut ) sometimes that I amaze even myself. So how could he possibly not know that I'm somewhat interested?

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

YOu are so good at teasing audience. Wasn't there more than that???? I am hoping it was. Think, Shigeki, Think!

Tell him you need to practice breast exams on his fabulous pecs next time. Really. please.

Anonymous said...

Maybe it's more about the opportunity to ravage BBB with physical affection. Perhaps an intimate dinner for two at your place with a movie in the bedroom afterward?

Musang said...

I don't know doctors can be that wicked. Heh, using your medical skills to steal a touch of his hand...

Anyway, not going to waste time for lots of questions, just want to ask the obvious.

Did you finished the chicken in 3 seconds flat and have a fuck with him at the restaurant toilet?

Now that's a total wicked

MrBunnyBan said...

Riiiight, I thought you meant you had just touched his hand when you passed him a chicken wing in your sms. I take back my "blah!".

Dude, it was so obvious what you were doing. He *let* you hold his hand for 1 minute. He's been going out with you for *whatever* very consistently. He isn't angry with you for flirting with him. He LIKES you.

Doesn't gurantee that will continue forever, but at least you can enjoy it while it lasts. However long that is.

Petie said...

Talk about doing Clinic duty, Have you ever heard of a TV serie called 'House M.D.'?

It's about a dianostician who never seems to like people and have a rather unique approach in finding the truth.

You might like it :) And on an unrelated note... When will the update on Marine came through? :P Will it still be about meet the mom? :P

jjd said...

you're such a hussy! With pickup lines like yours, I don't think there's any doubt as to your intentions.

Legolas said...

Yeah, you go, Paul! That's definitely something. And my intuition tells me that BBB is definitely interested with you, well, at least he's not rejecting, nope.

Your lonely days will soon be over! ;-p

Anonymous said...

Hey, BBB really said, "Finish your chicken first"? And he let you hold his hand in public for a whole minute? Yeah, I think he definitely likes you, Paul. And he probably likes all the attention too, lar. :oD

Whether he wants you as a close friend or as a boyfriend, I dunno, and maybe he doesn't know yet either. But I get the impression he's after a lot more than just a quick hump in the toilet. Hang in there. :o) (Oh, and maybe romantic comments might get you further than slutty ones. x )

canardbidon said...

gosh you are such a WHORE!!!
of course he knows! unless he is prettyfacenobrain (all the better to trick him into your wicked ways)

Anonymous said...

Paul Paul Paul Paul Paul... what you haven't told us was - was his pulse racing? ;)

Jay said...

And what happened after you finished your chicken?

Mark said...

Yeah! So how was his pulse.

And how come you see so much of him?

MrBunnyBan said...

He sees so much of him because they're both *going out*. You know...

Anonymous said...

I always thought that doctors have the same gibberish handwriting, which only a pharmacist could decipher.

So suave and swift, eh? I think he likes you, too. Just push it a lil more. And tell us more more more!

savante said...

Nothing more than that, shigeki :) Really, no teasing. And I shall certainly try those breast exams you mentioned next.

Brian, we have already done the dinner for two at my place with the movie in the living room. It was takeaway Chinese food and Kung Fu Hustle ( don't ask! )

Thought of the toilets, musang, but since he's a bit tall, I'd have the top of his head sticking out of the stalls. Talk about conspicuous.

Enjoying it while it lasts is what I'm doing, Daniel. And do I actualy go out al the time with him? :O

Pete! House MD! That's me! I love that show - and the nasty comments he makes.

Thanks, chas! Hot in bed? Seriously? :)

Leggy, don't congratulate me yet. It's far too early. He might yet turn out to have a Vietnamese child bride stashed somewhere.

ru, I like hearing romantic comments from guys but I can't say them. It makes me laugh to make corny statements like that.

Canard, I have to agree :)

weeshiong, his pulse was racing but it could be the fact that he was delirious with hunger for the chicken. How can any man subsist on leaves and shoots?

After the chicken, we went christmas shopping, jay :)

Mark, you're right. My handwriting has progressively become worse!!

Paul

Anonymous said...

Paul. laughing is good. Laughter can be very romantic. :o)