Tuesday, March 21, 2006

An apple a day

Over dinner the other day, I actually found another unusual myth that people have about physicians. One of the oddest preconceptions about doctors is the fact that as a general rule, all of us eat a healthy diet. Seriously, we are all supposed to consume a balanced meal with the right amount of carbohydrates, fat and proteins - with the prequisite amount of vitamins and minerals - as prescribed by the much vaunted food pyramid. Hell, I couldn't live on shoots and leaves! After all, I'm not the forever-dieting, near-vegetarian ( except in the vicinity of the nearest Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise ) alfalfa-munching Big Bicep Barry who claims that eating well makes him look and feel good.

I tell ya kids say the darndest things these days.

Barry : That roti tisu can't be that healthy. All sugar and carbs, right?
Paul : Sometimes you need to do what feels good, not what is right.
Barry : Very funny.
Paul : What the hell! You're not eating that egg?
Barry : Already did that actually, three herbal eggs. Just don't take the yolk.
Paul : That's the best part!
Barry : Just took half a yolk. Healthy diet, doctor. Need to tone my abs.
Paul : Uhh.. what's that?

Lemme whisper this bit of truth then. Sorry but I can tell y'all that it's essentially an urban legend and not at all true.

Most of us are stressed-up, crabby workaholics - but then you all know this :) Crammed as we are in the confines of the hospital with a scarcity of food supplies ( unsurprisingly I don't count the stale, plastic hospital regulation food as edibles fit for human consumption, no matter what the staff dietician says ) and a limited amount of time for food preparation and consumption ( gobbling up food in miliseconds between rounds doesn't exactly count ), we're not exactly the ideal proponents of a healthy diet. Essentially we're like starving human vultures who prey on whatever scraps of food are left around the pantry, gobbling up bits and pieces of leftovers to sustain enough energy to go on till the next day.

Hunka Grey Anatomy
Sure he looks good but do you know what's been going into that mouth?

And then when we leave the hospital, we go amok. At lunches, dinners and the occasional buffets. Nothing seems to be safe from our voracious appetite - not even the thickest slabs of luscious meat literally dripping with oil and animal fats, practically a screaming advertisement for a cholesterol laden heart attack. Life is certainly too short to squirm over the occasional calorie or twenty and after all, we've seen enough of healthy, gym-going dieters get run over by the occasional runaway bus to care ( I half-suspect driven by some enraged obese buffet-eaters keen on wiping them out ).

Every once in a while though, there is the occasional upstart doctor who preaches the art of healthy living but we're trying our best to eradicate them. Slowly. Painfully. Death by Big Macs.

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

Tell them to kiss your ass and eat a bannanna.

Dax

Anonymous said...

to be honest i try to be the alfalfa munching type, but those big macs always distract me. damn, how can BBB maintain such a strict diet?!

savante said...

Shouldn't that be kiss my ass and eat MY banana, dax? :)

Asmadi, I actually have no idea how he does it. I simply cannot live like that, eschewing my creature comforts. He claims that looking good makes him feel good - whatever that means.

paul

Rob said...

Realising I'm completely off topic, but, do we know how big these biceps are? I'd like to be the alfalfa munching type but I have a love affair with sugar that just won't quit.

Sue said...

The love of my life's father had a friend that was truly obese and tired of hearing his doctor tell him to lose weight or he would die. So he fired his doctor and hired one as obese as himself. Problem solved.

Anonymous said...

I do good to rival the mass of a bamboo tree right now. If I decided to eat "healthy", I'd be the size of a toothpick!

Maximus Leo said...

I will go with BBB's diet if I can but I'll appear to be too gay if I follow this strictly. However, having said that...I do indulge in KFC - Japanese style and the tempuras!

Oh if that fails, I swear by doing the full marathon - you'll solve all the problems of the excessive calories and carbo intake! :-)

Anonymous said...

I'm sure doctors eat just like any of us normal human beings do (oviously BBB is not normal!).

hrugaar said...

Yeah, just about all the docs I know seem to enjoy their creature comforts and a widely varied diet. Quite a few of them smoke too, go figure.

I have ideas about what could go into the photo guys mouth. ;oP

MrBunnyBan said...

Looking good makes him feel good - that's why most people gym, duh.
Yours truly an exception, of course. :)

I wonder what he expects from his partner to be.

Anonymous said...

Last year, I went ten months without a Mcburger. And when I finally bit into a quarter pounder, I nearly cried into the burger, it was so good. TEN MONTHS! How could I have been so stupid?

On a side note, I love hospital food. I used to steal my dad's meals when he was stuck in hospital for a fortnight.

Francis Ford Faggola said...

I dun diet at all but I found myself losing weight, especially since I've been unemployed. Wonder why? Then again, I am fat so nobody can tell, ehehhehe...

akihisa said...

You shoudn't diss those who are into healthy eating, you know. At least, they are doing it for all the right reasons. It's when they start preaching like crazy that's a killer. ;p

Excuse me, while I have my Burger King's Whopper and watch it go to my big-boned ass! LOL!

Anonymous said...

It's so difficult to resist the irresistable when your heart yields to it. Temptations are almost always, sweet. Are they not? ;)

Kiss My Mike said...

another misconception is that doctors are never sick.

NeiLDC said...

"Mother mother i am sick call the doctor very quick". We sometimes depend on what the doctor sayS!

Jim said...

This is how myths get started:

Hawkeye to Radar: Doctors never go to the bathroom, we eventually just explode.

Sue said...

I was in the hospital for 2 weeks and almost died from starvation the food was so bad. Seriously, I lost so much weight and looked like a skeleton at discharge.

BTW - Hrugaar, The actor pictured, Patrick Dempsey, is nicknamed Dr. McDreamy in Grey's Anatomy the T.V. show he is on.

Anonymous said...

Doctors are the worst patients!

rgds
shine

Anonymous said...

Dieting hmmm..scary words...how can one stand in controlling their diet.. I believe in the maxim in eating what you feel like eating..just don't over do it....like 9 rounds to the buffet counter is an overkill, You CAN have TOO much of a good thing.... this apply in all things in life, not only food....(think bout sex..I'm sure you dont want to be humping like rabbits 24/7 do u.....if any of u can do that..please let me know..I would like to submit you for Duracell advert)

Anyway....my word for the day..eat whatever you feel like eating and dnt give a damn bout those dripping fats and oils....if it wasn't made to be eaten, it shouldn't taste that great should it?

savante said...

Same here, Rob. I doubt I could give up my lovely chocs.

Sounds like your friend had the best idea, sue.

Somehow Bri, I think a bamboo tree would be an exaggeration.. you look so thin :)

Ian, Japanese style KFCs! What's that like?

Weeshiong, he isn't normal. I haven't seen him drink a single soft drink yet.

Not to mention guzzle beer by the barrel, ru :) BTW, sue is right and that's Patrick Dempsey - also played Will's boyfriend on Will and Grace.

Daniel, you mean we don't go the gym to ogle guys with big muscles?

You have gotta be kidding, Jamie. You like hospital food?

You can' tbe all that big, Holden, since you seem to be popular enough.

Okay! No dissing the dieting men, Ahmad :)

I usually give in to my temptations, mengteck.

Well, you've seen my sick complaints so that can't be true no more, kissmymike.

God, I love that line, n. armstrong!

Doctors just explode, jim? :)

They are, shine. It's pathetic how we whine on our sickbed.

A man after my own heart. quavadis, we are so going to eat buffet together!

paul