Thursday, April 06, 2006

Milestones

As we walk down the path to adulthood, there are several stops that we make. Certain events that make a significant milestones in our lives. Our first paycheck. Our first car. Our first night. If attending weddings on a monthly basis seems to be a certain milestone that signifies certain adulthood, wearing black to the funeral of a friend's father is certainly another. Although a sadder milestone that comes with passing age.

Dressing up in sober colours for the solemn, sombre affair - as Shameless Shalom put it... ash gray, dust-to-dust brown and charcoal black - certainly marks the occasion and it's hard not feel how fragile mortals actually are when you're standing close enough to the crematorium to imagine - if not feel - the heat of the undying flames. And it had to come at a time when I'd just managed to finish the last season of Six Feet Under which had one of the most terribly final conclusions ever made for a television series :) Death certainly made itself felt in that last episode.

Death Overtime


As a doctor, laypersons frequently ask me what it's like to work with death on an almost daily basis. With the hours I log in at the intensive care unit, it has become such a common daily occurrence that it's hard not to feel almost blasé over the fact that someone is actually dead. Fortunately, it's still almost and despite the trying situations I'm exposed to, I haven't turned dead inside yet. There are times when I still feel a slight pang but mostly I feel... a keen sense of how short life is and how much we should enjoy and appreciate how much time we have left here.

And how wonderful love can sometimes be - that it can last even beyond death.

All these sobering thoughts went through my head even as I wondered how anyone ( that Shalom! ) could possibly buy hideous blue dahlias for a funeral bouquet.

12 comments:

Matt. K. said...

That's right! Appreciate life as long you're still living! Love while you can! In short, just enjoy life while you still can!

I guess I'm not much of a philosopher. =P.

Wild Reeds said...

Beautiful post. Carpe diem.

Unknown said...

My best friend, who's studying medicine at the moment, had some real depressive thoughts after her first contact with dead bodies (you sure know better than me what she's doing in those classes). Now she's quite comfortable around them (what does that say about her?). Anyway, it's important to be aware of life and how short it really is.
So, be happy and enjoy! :)

Jay said...

I have a lovely dark Aquascutum suit that's perfect for funerals. Thankfully, I've only ever had to wear it for happy occassions.

hrugaar said...

I prefer funerals to weddings. I suppose one reason is that at weddings the pressure is always on us 'singles' to get married too. At funerals, people seldom ask you when you're planning on dying.

But blue dahlias?!! :oD

quicksilverlining said...

never been to a funeral. i dunno. i think that the dead probably have it better than us. at least they don't have to worry about what to wear tomorrow.

tempus fugit. sigh.

Anonymous said...

its good to think about death every now n then. At least you know that you not going to live forever n by doing so, you cherish you life even more every single day. I wish I would outlive my wife n kids though..

Matt. K. said...

Pakcik, why would someone wanna do that? Isn't painful to be seeing all your loved ones dying before you? The hurt and sorrow when your loved ones leave.

I always hope that I was the one who died first so that I need not attend my loved ones' funerals and to save me from all the tears I shed during funerals.

But it's all in the hands of God. Pain needs to be felt.

akihisa said...

I kinda understand why pakcik wants to do such a thing. It's like better for you to bear the pain of losing instead of your loved ones feeling it. A very un-selfish thing to do, I think.

Last year, I watched my uncle being buried. Seeing his youngest son, who is about one yo called out to him was heartbreaking. Tears flowed in streams. Poor thing doesn't know a thing. I was clueless on how to handle the child.

I guess, it is up to us to savour every waking moment of our life. Then, we know we had live our life to the fullest.

savante said...

Thanks, matt and wild reeds :)

Well it is certainly depressing in the beginning but once you look past all that, you start to appreciate life and how terribly precious it is, camydi.

Ooh. Show us that suit, jay!

Don't know what it was but it looked like blue dahlias, ru. Hideous.

quicksilverlining... count your blessings :)

pakcik, outlive your wife and kids?! :O Makes sense if you think the way Ahmad does, I guess.

Paul

mr tickle said...

The picture with the guy in the hoody looks pretty interesting. What is it all about?

savante said...

IT's from a series called Dead Like Me.

Paul