Ghosts of Christmas Future

Well, just to tell you what's gonna be happening in the coming future - yeah, I do have moments of pseudo-clairvoyancy! :P Since I finally have a place of my own, I think it's time I do what every gay devotee of Martha Stewart has been doing since her good housekeeping bibles first got published ( you mean you're all not devotees?! ) and host a fabulous dinner party.

For Christmas no less! Don't get all excited yet. I'm hardly gonna dress a turkey and bake some pies - where the hell am I gonna find the time? Charming Calvin's earning big yuans up north but he's refusing to subsidize my expensive high-maintenance habits so I'm gonna have to continue slogging at work for minimal wages.

Yes. Bah-humbug.


A Decadent Christmas at Paul's...
But I can easily speed-dial a reliable caterer. So I'll start small first.

No worries, folks. It won't be as decadent as the one above - I'll have to work up to that slowly. Just take a look at the mailed invite.

So here's how it is. I'll be back the weekend before Christmas - that should be around the 21st for you guys. Should be having a small dinner then so you're all invited. A few can stay over if you guys want but expect to rough it out a bit ( expect wandering hands from me especially if I've been downing Bailey's ). No vodkas or tequila shots - Bailey's at the most! Mostly coffee and tea though. Civilized chatter. It's Christmas after all. :) No prayers and chants to sweet baby Jesus so you can all rest easy - we're really non-religious if you haven't guessed by now.

And leave the Wiis and the X-Boxes at home, expect to play old-fashioned board games and watch a ton of weepy sentimental romantic comedies such as Love Actually and The Holiday. It's Christmas and I spend the evenings weeping over irish cream and romantic movies.

Hey it's a tradition.

Now, wouldn't Martha be proud? No doubt she'd expect personally hand-written scented letters ( with environmentally friendly mini-reminders of RSVP ingeniously made up of bits of ribbon and scrap ) but hell, I'm not a dedicated househusband yet! So emails will have to do for now.

What about New Year's? Well I hear Jaunty Jared has another surprise planned for us - fresh from his party-planning triumph last week. A New Year in the tropics? Jared in a skimpy thong? I am so there - and I intend to be there armed with sangria ( the better to get Jared loose and drunk - the easier to take advantage of! ) and my trusty though long-suffering camera ( the better to record the lurid event for future blackmail ).