Saturday, January 01, 2011

Cheery New Year

Haven't had a club stamp on my arm since... well almost forever.

Yet there I was in a thumpa thumpa club waiting for the countdown while inebriated college kids swayed recklessly on the tables. Post-teenage skanks in frilly minis barely the size of handkerchiefs shook their moneymakers on the podiums while the boys drooled over their Jack Daniels.

Blame Pirating Patty.

Paul : Fucking hell. I can't believe you dragged me here.
Patty : But it's the new year countdown.
Paul : We almost counted down to a thumping by the bouncer when we got here.
Patty : Fuck that bouncher. Telling us to pay cover charge when we've opened a couple of bottles?
Paul : Preferable to paying a hospital bill, I should think.
Patty : Nah, he wouldn't hurt a teeny lil girl like me. It would hurt his rep.
Paul : Stop picking fights with tattooed bouncers. I don't run that fast.

And that was the extent of our speech for almost an hour as we screamed ourself hoarse over the din of the neverending thumpa thumpa. Didn't help that the club, not only packed to the rafters, was enshrouded in a choking haze of cigarette smoke. Getting down and dirty - oh yeah one of the teenage girls heaved her dinner two tables away - in one of the skankiest clubs in town.

A far cry from our earlier dinner of oysters and lobsters at a swanky hotel under a night sky lit up with fireworks. Also chockful of people! This little town that could certainly trebles its population for events such as this.

chase
It's time for fireworks!

Though the night out did make me sorta curious. If the horny straight fellas head to the clubs to get laid but the male : female ratio's far from satisfactory, what the hell's the point?

And please don't tell me they are searching for love. You don't find that in clubs. Seriously. In an oil town like this, boys outnumber girls by a factor of 3. Fact made obvious by the woefully inept boppers worshipping at the stilettos of the few fillies on the dancefloor. Think Scarlett O'Hara with her bevy of fawning beaus - except with far less taste. Some of the girls don't even have as much class as Scarlett's hanky.

Really, if all they want is to get off, why not do it with each other instead? Better than blue balls. Even Patty's tripping colleagues, who struck out and decided to get pissed instead, were looking quite tasty as the night went on. Maybe I should lend a hand to that auld acquaintance.


So that was my New Year's. How was yours?

5 comments:

Chen Xing said...

Lol, went counting down in the club as well. Then, danced like there's not tomorrow.

:)

SynchingZincInc said...

No wonder CB sounded familiar. But don't know whether Cherrie Berries still running or not.

Had a few rounds at some hotel bar. Happy New Year!

Kenny Mah said...

My NYE was spent watching distant fireworks from the comforts of my balcony, then satisfied that all the noise was over, crawling into bed for a good night's sleep.

Boring but satisfying. :P

Happy New Year!!

quicksilverlining said...

spent the countdown sleeping. no better time, i say.

and towards the end, sounded like YOU were getting inebriated.

Mr.D said...

I waited for 12am and then i hit the bed. =D